What You Do When Two People Disagree: Approach and a Real Example

In a behavioral interview for a software engineer role at Google, you are asked: what do you do when two people disagree? Describe your approach and support it with a concrete example from your own experience. ```hint Find the real crux Before deciding how to resolve it, work out what each side is optimizing for and what evidence would change each person's mind. ``` ```hint When agreement does not come Plan for the case where the two never converge: who decides, how the decision is made, and what happens once it goes against one side. ``` ### Clarifying Questions - Are the two people me and a colleague, or two other people whose disagreement I need to help resolve? - Is this about a technical disagreement, such as a design choice, or about priorities and ways of working? - Should I describe a general approach, a specific example, or both? ### What a Strong Answer Covers - A specific situation with real stakes rather than a hypothetical - Understanding both positions and the goals behind them before arguing for one - Moving the discussion toward evidence, prototypes or agreed criteria, and involving the right decision maker when needed - Respectful communication that preserves the working relationship - A clear outcome, including committing to the decision when it did not go your way, and what you learned ### Follow-up Questions - Tell me about a time you were the one who turned out to be wrong in a disagreement. - What if the other person is more senior than you and will not engage with your data? - When do you escalate, and how do you do it without damaging the relationship? - How did your working relationship with that person develop afterward?